Graceful Exodus

Despite the office drama (which is mostly self-inflicted), I still had what I really want during office exodus: a graceful exit. It was not the mushy kind of exit, but at least it was a good exit.

I always wanted to be the invisible kind in a company. I wanted to be the unrecognized and unnoticed but my boyfriend Dave said that’s not possible. I was kind of uplifted when I got three promotion/career shift offers. Although not one materialized, the fact that I was trusted is more than enough.

For roughly eight months I’ve learned a lot. Bulk and rush writing (my record is 3,000 words a day), writing while chatting while talking with officemates, NOT overdressing, eating while writing, other than enjoying my purpose and making friends.

My job suited me. It was near my place, no heavy traffic jams, no heavy interaction with other people, lenient boss (compared to the boss I had in my previous job), and the company required no dress codes. The company uncaged me from captivity (courtesy of my first job).

But good things must still come to an end.

I want to explore the outside world. I want to see how well I have been fairing and measure my value. I want to park my pen and diversify.

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It was storming on my last day at work. I don’t know if it added to the drama, but it sure was a sad-happy ending for my stay in the office and the little world I built on my workstation. I intentionally left a few writing assignments on my last day to give them a full blast while some office mates made everything happier and sadder.

My last article was about moving on.

On my last hour, my batchmates gave me a Snoopy doll, which we instantly named “December” (because that’s the time we were hired). I sent them a long e-mail, taking into account all our good times. It was the longest e-mail I wrote during my stay but it was the best. My team leader handed me a letter (with a purple ribbon) and a bar of Snickers. Later did I find out that almost everyone in the office wrote a note to me, bidding me luck on my next career. I swear I didn’t cry but somehow I wanted to spend another day in the office to whack and hug everybody.

I wrote a welcome note to my replacement (whom I trained last week).

A lot of people asked me what would happen to Dave. For those who still don’t know, Dave and I met at the office and we played the writer-SEO kind of relationship there. Dave stays in the company for as long as he wants (and the company wants). We both agreed that it is better not to have relationships inside the office since they could surmount professionalism, particularly the drive to work. Dave still has our framed photo on his desk. I will not be forgotten.

It was storming when I got out of the office for the last time (as an employee) but I see the sun now. I just got hired for a home-based job while typing this very blog entry.

Auf Wiedersehen, Makati

After roughly seven months of being away from my comfort zone, I’m back to where my family is, to the trees and windy nights, to the simple life, to the life less complicated. If there’s anything staying away from home has taught me, that is living independently.

I was fine in Makati. I lived in a condominium, had a job that quite suits me, had a lifestyle that was quite far from being a princess, but I managed. I just had to leave everything behind. I need to think.

I had to survive the depression a break-up has caused me, but the way I took made everything worse. I was not fine although I was never alone. I love Dave so much but I have to clear my mind from all the anger, sadness and every sanity-breaking emotion I’ve had for the past four months. I have to better myself to be able to give more.

I packed my things so quickly I never thought of anything but going home. I called dad and asked him to pick me up. I took my bags, boxes and put all my things (thanks to Tracee). I left Kingswood in the midst of heavy rains. I watched the building fade from the rain as dad drew farther away. I wanted to cry as hard as the rain that afternoon, but I kept still. I watched the CBD buildings fade from my sight, hoping that someday I’ll get back.

This is probably my saddest night this year, but at least I have my family to be there for me. I’ll be fine, and if Dave thinks I’m worth the wait, then I’ll come back to him with no second thoughts.

I don’t consider any other place aside from Makati. I was attached to it like it’s my second home (it IS my second home). ‘Til I see you again, Makati, till I see you again.